The Science of Finding Balance…

Five mantras you can use to optimize your time where it matters most.

I woke up this morning and made a hot cup of coffee. While sipping it slowly in the warm glow of my sunroom, I began to reflect on question I get regularly from my good friends, ““How do you continue to balance your time between family and work, and still ride as much as you do?” The idea of balancing my work passions with my life passions is something I work hard to achieve. To give you a little context, I am a ADHD Gen. X’er adrenaline junkie that loves all sports that you stand sideways (Kite, Surf, Skate, Snowboard). I have two awesome little girls and a very patient and loving wife. I am also a busy professional with a ton on my plate – if I’m not jetting to random locales around the world doing research, I find myself regularly chock-a-block full with meetings sharing said research. By now you most likely are also asking the question, “so when do you have time to do anything else?” We’ll get to that soon…

Breaking it down

Let's start at the top – my brain. It may not be wired like most, but as I said earlier, I am a researcher and have an unquenchable curiosity for everything that makes us tick. Because of this, I find myself breaking behaviors, actions, and observations down into pieces that can be analyzed and understood. So, when I think about the science of finding balance. My mind starts spinning on what I have seen, heard or done.

There are usually two main categories associated with our mentality towards work. Those of us wind addicts who look at work as a dreaded necessity, while others look at their work as an opportunity for enjoyment and self-fulfillment. I want both and more. The path I have come to more accurately see most of us on involves the intersections between work, play, and creative expression. Most of us have demanding jobs, wonderful families we want to spend time with, and kiting as direct expression of our creativity and thus this last part is essential to our wellbeing. This means we need to deliberately divide our time to engage in the moments that matter. Seek the moments at work that make you passionate about what you are doing, find those times with your family that bring you true joy, and capture every chance you find to get on the water.

Find your Balance points

Exploring this idea leads me down the path of a typical day. Just like most of my fellow shredders (usually also ADHD), the slightest whisper of a good wind and the opportunity to ride quickly takes a typical day and turns it on its ear - You can’t structure your time around Mother Nature’s unpredictability. Accepting this reality is the first step to finding your balance points.

If you let go of trying to detail out your days and follow a few simple mantras you can maximize your water time along side all your other responsibilities.

1. Focus on your family first – For me it’s about quality over quantity. I try my hardest to assess which days I get on the water. I reserve my water time for those days that really matter vs. those days where I’m schloggin’ through the lake and end up bummed about my session anyway.
2. Start off everyday building a mental to-do list – I take time to think through what really needs to get done every day. Realistically we all have those days when there’s no escape - those evenings when you just can’t miss the dance recital. Plan for these times and understand there are moments between these moments – of course those are sometimes the days that are epic warm wind and water with everyone texting you to get on it as fast as possible. Oh, and you know if you don’t get on it you will definitely hear how you missed the most rad session ever (yeah, you know who I’m talking about).
3. Set yourself up for happiness – recognize what’s important to you and align your life around the enablers to make it happen. Personally I want the best of work, life, and play. For me this means that I must live near the water even though my office is an hour away and I work closely with my colleagues to have a very mobile/flexibility work ethic – of course this means you are often working at odd hours to grab a quick session when the wind is prime.
4. Work hard, but play smarter – I always try to have my gear in my car. At least here in the Great Lakes, you never know when you can grab a session, so be prepared – even if you only get a quickie. If you travel for work a lot, do some research and travel with a base set-up. From the coasts of France to Korea I can’t tell you how many random sessions I’ve scored just because I scoped out the area, planned my time around meetings, and set expectations with my local colleagues before I got there.
5. Know why you ride – I will be the first to say that my particular approach to balance won’t set me up to make a career out of kiting. I love the sport, but for me it has a purpose. Kiteboarding is my creative expression and stress relief activity (just ask my wife and she can tell you how grumpy I get if I don’t get a regular dose). Allocate the time to simply enjoy yourself and let the world fall away. Ask yourself, “Why do I ride? “ You may find the answer helps you put all the other things in your life into perspective.

I hope this quick set of mantras I live by helps you edge closer to a bit more balance. I know it’s hard and it takes a little work to there, but once you find your groove you will maximize your happiness.